"Can i rest??" --> dis is a ques for myself...
by answering myself, e ans is "NO!!"
cuz im feeling miserable nw, feeling to isolate frm every single 1...
i dunno y, today is e 4th day...
i was quite ok at 1st, dis "emo-ness" came to mi eva since tues...
bt it flashes bak everyday, almost every mmt...
i tried nt to feel dat way, in order to stop giving myself any stress or covered myself...
bt u did, trying to bring u out once again... making mi fall in wif u...
i shall nt say moi "emo-ness" r deeper den u, cuz i noe its nt...
i juz feel like isolating frm e world, a world where nobody notices mi at all
yes, i mention 'at all'
dun feel like contacting any1, juz wanna b kept alone...
bt i noe its impossible...
sometimes realli thinking, if im dead, dat will b solved...
i will haf no prbx, no stress, no nth... isn't it cool??
hw i wish im dead, so relief~

i wanted to bring u out of e darkness once again...
if onliz u willing to hold mi n let mi lead u out once again dis time...
though dis rnd is another thingy alr...
it seems like many things happened, bt actually it happen like many things happened...
okies, i dunno wad im saying alr... im totally filled wif messy wires here n dere...

i noe hw u think of it, bt u c... things dat alr happened, will it rewind n change it??
impossible...
wad can u do when things alr happened n cant b changed anymore...
is to face it, change ur mind-setting, n make it a betta 1...
hw to make it a betta 1, is hw u gonna think abt it...
bt 1st of all is "things happened cant b changed", rmbx...
do u wan mi to b wif u n lead u out TGT,
or u wanna walk out alone, where im behind or in front of u??
wad u're doing nw is alr somehw like u're walking alone...
n im like dunno where, ard u... walking behind u, follow where eva u go...
is like walking n walking wif no destination n direction...
or mayb izzit like standing on e same spot for several mmt...

i realli wish dat u can fully walk out of e circle...
ran to mi n hug mi like usual... e day im longing for...
ur reply for mi r getting slower n ur behavior r getting uncleared...
e way u treated mi, dis miserable days r more like wks n mths to mi...
sometimes im realli thinking whether izzit u wan mi to gif u more time n space to think...
or u wan mi to b wif u to put u up...
bt u dun seems to wanna b out wif mi again, like usual did...
i pulled u up n u jumped bak in, when i hvn get e chance to notice it...

sry for reader who dun unds wad i mean for dis post...
dis post r meant for moi darling, n onliz he will unds dis...
n i hope he does unds wad i mean...
ps : thanks readers for ur effort reading it...
plz dun ask mi wad happened, thank you!