i suddenly feel so lonely, so hopeless...
its been a long time since i haf dis kind of feeling...
worries nvr fail to pester ard mi...
while ytd nite alone looking aft moi bro, e feeling getting stronger...
especially when he slept v early ytd nite...
i smsed darling, okies he was drank...
called mommy ard 11.25pm cuz she wasn't hm...
she promissed to b hm latest by 10.30pm...
i waited, waited n waited till 11.25pm...
nt even a single call, dis nerve mi... where on hell is she??
so i called her, she was on e bus -.-
i started somehw scolded her, she juz xplained dat she went dinner wif frenz...
bt u shd at least gif mi a call rite...
u noe i waited like so long, waiting for u to come bak...
is totally like 3days nvr c u leh, u think i realli dun care ar...
mayb dey dun care, u think i aso mehx...
u always wan mi gif u a call if i come hm late aft a certain time i told u...
den u leh, aso muz at least gif mi a call mahx...
u think onliz u will worry for mi, i wun ar...
den dis morning wake up, u aso nt at hm...
wahlao, i wan cry liao lor... izzit u dunno i will worry for u??
even though u always v naggy n v fan...
even though i like always heck care u, quarrel wif u...
actually in moi heart, i treasure it...
every single mmt of it... at least happened...

i had a dream... it seems simple, nth...
bt to mi, is like a nite mare...
a dream dat will make mi cry...
i dreamt i was wif moi frenz out till nxt morning...
staying over nite in sch...
nt even a single call or msg frm darling...
till nct morning i went msn...
his 1st react c-ing mi on9 was "omg, hw come u on9??"
den i was like, i cant on9 de mehx...
dunch u even worry for mi?? still say till like u dun wan c mi on9...
nxt, u din even concern abt mi...
n asked mi to intro moi frenz to u... its like 'omg' to mi...
sometimes i think.......... will u leave mi 1 day??
will sth happen btw us 1 day?? juz a feeling u will leave mi any mmt...
ur promisses r meant to b broken, bt nt mine...
i cant imagine wad will happen if u leave mi...
cuz i nvr tot of it... moi future r all abt U, U n juz U...
let mi haf e trust on u, let mi feels e secure...

mei ar, gt prbx muz share... dun always kip for urself...
u xinku, jiejie c le aso heart pain...
u always say half way jiu nvr say, make mi more worry for u leh...
u say wan jiejie pei u go walk walk, den aso nvr...
-sad sad-
i realli hope nxt wk can go out, cuz i aft dat wk will b busy...

holi makes every1 drift apart...
we dun even haf a single gathering...
like nvr contact ever since holi started...

i xperienced e feeling of lonely b4...
so i dun wan to xperience it again...
i wan every1 ard mi to b happy, dat will do...
as long as u all happy, i will...
ur prbx = moi prbx, moi prbx = moi prbx...
bt i dun care, as long as u all happy can liao...
i realli wishes some1 i love can b happy...
hw i wish some1 can hold mi tight, hug mi into their arms [loneliness]
worries nvr fails to leave mi...




-crying of sadness;loneliness;hopeless-